Why is it that after feeling like total crap all day, at 9:30pm, I feel good. I don't understand... Why did I have to suffer all day to get to a point where I'm feeling decent? It just doesn't seem fair because now I'm wide awake and doing work and being productive and I'm setting myself up to have yet another crappy day because I won't get any sleep!
Oh well, I guess I will take what I can get.
After I wrote that last post the day did improve slightly... After a little sob session when hubby came home (I was feeling sorry for myself and as soon as I saw him, burst into tears) we went to meet with another pediatrician, took a long walk and then went out for lobsters (there is this place near our apartment that does $25 lobster and a beer night, with fries). It was delicious and just what I needed...
Thursday, August 18, 2011
A zombie with a parasite
Today I feel like total crap. I'm ridiculously tired on top of being ridiculously tired of being pregnant. Last night and up until now I've slept in intervals of 2.5 hours and have been up for hours in between. I'm finding it very hard to function... I guess this is a glimpse of what early motherhood will be like, but the kicker is that I don't yet have the baby... Right now, all I have is this massive belly that is clearly and quite literally sucking the life out of me.
To say I'm grumpy and cranky would be a massive understatement. I'm feeling a bit like a prisoner too... I want to get out and do things (and even want to do things at home) but I can barely keep transitioning from the couch to the bed and back. I'm so damn sleepy and sore. And on top of that, I'm still working... Not more than a few hours a day, but I'm working and that's becoming increasingly challenging when I have days like today where I feel brain dead. It's fine on days when I'm feeling good... It's a nice distraction... But today I want nothing more than to lie around like the zombie I feel like...
I know that labor and delivery is not going to be fun, but at the end, at least I will have a sweet little baby to care for and I will feel like the tiredness and discomfort is serving a purpose... Now it just feels like the icing on the cake of an already challenging pregnancy. Oh, and did I mention, I hate cake (and I don't really like icing either).
To say I'm grumpy and cranky would be a massive understatement. I'm feeling a bit like a prisoner too... I want to get out and do things (and even want to do things at home) but I can barely keep transitioning from the couch to the bed and back. I'm so damn sleepy and sore. And on top of that, I'm still working... Not more than a few hours a day, but I'm working and that's becoming increasingly challenging when I have days like today where I feel brain dead. It's fine on days when I'm feeling good... It's a nice distraction... But today I want nothing more than to lie around like the zombie I feel like...
I know that labor and delivery is not going to be fun, but at the end, at least I will have a sweet little baby to care for and I will feel like the tiredness and discomfort is serving a purpose... Now it just feels like the icing on the cake of an already challenging pregnancy. Oh, and did I mention, I hate cake (and I don't really like icing either).
All baby
I went to the doctor today and my BP is good, weight is on track and Brady's heartbeat is strong. I'm still only dilated 1cm, but again, that means nothing... I'm measuring at 39 weeks and the doctor is guessing that he's about 7+lbs. She felt around my belly and all she could say, was, wow, you're all baby! It's pretty wild. When you feel my stomach, all you feel is this giant, super rock hard mass...I have no other pregnant bellies to compare it to, but based on the doctor's reaction I can only guess that other bellies have some softer spots where baby isn't occupying...
Granted, doctors can often be "off" when it comes to estimating the weight, but I just have a feeling that she's not and he's not going to be a little pipsqueak like me and my brother were (both in the 6lb+ range). I'm thinking that he's going to cook for another week or so, which means he's only going to get bigger...
Today was a tired day... All day I was pretty fatigued. I actually passed out at about 8pm. I woke back up at around 10:30 and now I'm wide awake having some cereal and watching tv. It's so funny... every day when I'm up in the night like this, I open the fridge and I see the eggs and milk staring back at me with their expiration dates emblazoned on the side... The milk expires on the 23rd and the eggs on the 27th (my due date). I stare at them and wonder, what will happen first, will this milk expire or will Brady arrive? It's odd for me to think about the fact that the next eggs and milk we buy will have an expiration date past the time when Brady will likely be here...
The doctor told me that they won't let me go past 42 weeks and if he doesn't come naturally by 41 weeks, they will induce me. I have my weekly doc appointment scheduled for next Wed and if he doesn't arrive by Friday, I have a follow-up appointment at the hospital to get a biophysical and non stress test, which is basically an in-depth sonogram to make sure the baby is ok, I have enough fluid, etc... That's when they would determine if I need to be induced earlier than 41 weeks.
At this point, I feel like my life is set to that jeopardy music... do do, do do, do do, do, do do, do do, do, dododododo... Just waiting for the answer (i.e. baby) to be revealed!
Granted, doctors can often be "off" when it comes to estimating the weight, but I just have a feeling that she's not and he's not going to be a little pipsqueak like me and my brother were (both in the 6lb+ range). I'm thinking that he's going to cook for another week or so, which means he's only going to get bigger...
Today was a tired day... All day I was pretty fatigued. I actually passed out at about 8pm. I woke back up at around 10:30 and now I'm wide awake having some cereal and watching tv. It's so funny... every day when I'm up in the night like this, I open the fridge and I see the eggs and milk staring back at me with their expiration dates emblazoned on the side... The milk expires on the 23rd and the eggs on the 27th (my due date). I stare at them and wonder, what will happen first, will this milk expire or will Brady arrive? It's odd for me to think about the fact that the next eggs and milk we buy will have an expiration date past the time when Brady will likely be here...
The doctor told me that they won't let me go past 42 weeks and if he doesn't come naturally by 41 weeks, they will induce me. I have my weekly doc appointment scheduled for next Wed and if he doesn't arrive by Friday, I have a follow-up appointment at the hospital to get a biophysical and non stress test, which is basically an in-depth sonogram to make sure the baby is ok, I have enough fluid, etc... That's when they would determine if I need to be induced earlier than 41 weeks.
At this point, I feel like my life is set to that jeopardy music... do do, do do, do do, do, do do, do do, do, dododododo... Just waiting for the answer (i.e. baby) to be revealed!
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