Butt what?

Today I had an appointment for a routine dental checkup.  I have read that dental hygiene is super important during pregnancy and that proper care is essential for the health of mom and baby.  Apparently all the wonderful hormones make you more susceptible to gum disease which can somehow hurt the baby (I have no idea how this happens). 

I have been seeing my dentist for about nine years now (since I've lived in NYC).  He has a nice receptionist, M.  M is not your typical dental receptionist... he has long hair, drives a motorcycle, dabbles in photography and he always has lots to say!  He's a good guy but you also kind of get a creepy vibe from him.  (My friends all agree... there are a few of us that see him).  He's always been good to me, emailing me to let me know when I need to schedule an appointment and he's very flexible when I have to reschedule my appointment three or four times because of my crazy work schedule. 

I arrive for the appointment and am quickly ushered into an exam room where the hygienist notices my bump as soon as I begin to take off my coat.  She tells me that because I'm expecting we will skip the X-rays for this visit.  Yay - I hate those cards they stick in your mouth and the heavy pad on my body!  She then goes on to tell me about her little ones (a boy and a girl) and how her son just flushed her engagement ring down the toilet.  Oh, one of the many things I have to look forward to.  Then the dentist comes in.  She tells me how important dental hygiene is during pregnancy and then gives me a thorough cleaning.  My teeth look good and she sends me on my way.

As I'm checking out, M tells me that I should come back in three months for another cleaning (something they recommend for pregnant gals).  We make the appointment and then he asks me if we know what we're having.  I explain that we find out in two short weeks.  He then goes on to tell me that he's never wrong in his predictions so I ask him what he thinks I'm having.  And he tells me that he has a methodology that is without fail.  I ask him what it is and he explains that he didn't get a chance to check out my butt and that usually if the mom-to-be has a larger butt than she used to, then she is likely having a boy.  I'm not quite sure how he expected me to respond to this statement... Did he want me to do a slow spin and show him my goods?  Because that wasn't gonna happen.   I told him that I didn't think my rear had expanded so that was just more evidence that I was having a girl.  He took my word for it as I wrapped my super long cardigan and coat tightly around me and walked out of the office...